Hi there! looking for help and info?

Okay so i came out as bisexual to my friends and family a few years back aswell as telling them i felt like i was possibly transgendered. As i child i would always feel more comfortable in and around female freinds and would always play dress up and want the girls toys. Growing up i never grew out of this however i did begin to hide it and feel like i was doing something wrong. I felt ashamed of myself. But after coming out and telling everyone i felt so much better. I really want to begin treatments and transition as i feel its what i need and what i really want. Im not very femenine in voice or how i ct i feel very tom boyish but not right in my own skin if that makes sense. I am generally unhappy day to day and the only time i feel happy and myself are the times im dressed female with make up and clothing. I live in the west midlands and im just not sure what to do where to go or who to speak to about any of this. I have never really reched out to the nhs because i feel like i would be laughed at or told no. Its getting to a point where im thinking about just getting what i need online and doing it myself wich i know is both dangerous and risky. I just feel like i need help.