Crossdress Progress

Im a crossdresser, transvestite. I havent been a bad looking man, Ive had hetero relationships with girlfriends and a little gay experience up until my mid 20s, dressing emerged once or twice. I had been dressing occasionally with family members clothes (of course, if your trans you'll understand this). I was bi and had male, female and TS partners, with some dressing. I spent time on the gay scene and in a gay sports club, found it relatively easy to have a few gay relationships but dressing was always there and emerged once. When I had a log term hetero relationship I was faithful, when it declined I bought clothes shoes underwear and wigs etc and when it ended I have been online for cd tv fun but have never shown my face in real life or online. Not having been practicing makeup from a young age as females have, I understand, like a lot of trannys I have to learn it now. I now feel that I should do that, get waxed and meet people socially, dressed if I dont bottle out. Last night I went to www.outsavvy.com/event/8920/london-trans-meet-up and it was loud and busy but I was in drab whilst lots of dressed T gurls were having drinks and chats. I talked with only one person and I went home but I enjoyed the experience, a change from being indoors online. I like meeting other cd tvs socially in drab for now. I have signed up for the zoom session here on Thursday next week so that might be the time I am dressed and made up online for the first time. I am half scared I will look awful, the other half is trying not to care. These are little steps towards dont know where, its just a buzz to be planning it at the moment